Random writings: Mentoring

I wanted to write something interesting, related to this topic but once I started, I realized that it is not such an easy topic to put into words… I have so many thoughts at the moment but how to put everything nicely…? I still don’t know but will I ever?...

I have been a mentor for 4 semesters (2 years). I remember the excitement I felt the very first time I got the list with soon to be new foreign students and the curiosity of what kind of people I will get. Will they like it here? Will I be of any help to them?... All kind of thoughts and questions were flooding in my mind… I was new to this, barely even knew what to do or what to expect.

First step, Introduction! Oh, how much I have struggled with that one. Later on, it was just a copy + paste process. Second part was the toughest. Waiting for people reply was never as difficult as it was at that time… I checked my email and all SNS accounts that I notified them off, 10 times an hour. That’s some excitement I would say… Right? I was very VERY excited about it. I always am… Getting the list of new people who you’re in charge off is always so exciting.

First meetings... Ha, they are memorable but very awkward, that’s understandable though… Imagine, you’re meeting a total stranger, with whom you only exchanged couple of text messages but never saw in real life, and above all you’re in a foreign country, where you don’t know a single thing… It’s somehow terrifying if you think about it… isn’t it? But you guys are not alone in this… Mentors are also anxious… We know as little about you as you know about us. So, my dear friend, we all are on the same pages!

I have heard phrase such as, “Mentoring is a tough job, I wouldn’t do it.” a lot. No guys, it’s not, it’s like taking care of your own personal things. Fine, first time it might be difficult because you’re as lost as your mentees, you don’t know how to act or what to do. You’re in a learning and exploration process. However, even that is interesting! To be fair, I personally think that mentor is needed only at the very beginning of the semester, a few weeks after your arrival. That’s why it’s common for some mentors to disappear after couple of weeks. There are mentors who doesn’t bother showing up at all… I never understood them, and I probably never will. I like to keep in touch with all my mentees. I know that I’m not doing it often, I also loose the track of time, like each and every one of us… And after each semester I feel guilty that I haven’t hung out with them more often at least with those who wanted to do it. There are also those who barely need my help; who are fine on their own; those who ignore their mentors or they find other people who help them. And that’s fine with me.  At first, I felt bad about it but later on I realized that we can’t get along with everyone.

(A writing from 2018 summer)

Addition:

I still stand for what I wrote above but I don’t think I will want to be a mentor anymore. After 2018 summer I was suppose to go on my Erazmus in Slovenia, however things didn’t work out well and I had to back off from it. So I have decided to come back to mentors crew for the very last semester in Vytautas Magnus University. I thought it will be great. It wasn’t bad, I don’t regret anything but at the end of the day, I did realize that I should have just stayed low and I’m not sure I would like to do it again. Don’t get me wrong, it was a great experience, I met very amazing people in the process and most of them weren’t my mentees, however, now, I cannot imagine my life without them. They were the ones that made my university life memorable and enjoyable. So, Thank you guys!!! But it’s just that, I’m tired of dealing with all sorts of people especially when I’m investing my time without getting anything in return. 

That's gonna be all from me. I will probably come back with other blog soon and I'm thinking of writing one about VMU. 

And as always, feel free to give out some suggestions. 

Have a good day!